I love the blogging community -the people, the content, the dialogues that open between individuals all over the world. It's incredible. And I love weekly features, sponsor programs, giveaways, all of that. But I feel like I have been trying to fit myself into a blogging space that is just the wrong shape for me. I am not, by nature, an organized person. And despite how positive I try to make this space, I am not always a positive person. There's a lot of dark things in my life, I struggle with anxiety and depression, and sometimes I'm just angry. And I try not to let all that seep into my online life, but it's difficult sometimes.
And when it comes down to, although the upbeat and loving persona you all see on this blog is a part of me, it's only a small part. That's only who I am sometimes, and it's tiring to try to be that person for my readers every time I post. I feel like I'm lying, something that I really don't want to do.
So here's the truth of it. I love bohemian aesthetics, exploring spirituality, spreading love, and all of that. But I also love to be up to my ears in books, write about monsters and magic, get trashed and dance all night, marathon fantasy/supernatural tv shows, talk about literature and mythology, swear like a sailor, bake at two in the morning, and sometimes dress like I'm ready to kill a man.
I don't have a "brand" -something that for a long time I thought I needed to be a successful blogger. I have spent a lot of time trying to pin my brand down, never satisfied with what I came up with. But now I can honestly said that I don't want a brand. I can't fit my personality into a single aesthetic and I'm sick of trying.
I'm not sure where that leaves me in the blogging world, but I do know that I want to be more honest in my posts. We'll see where it takes me.